Fish in the Adirondacks: Building a Shelter
I often get asked “What should I do I have no tent?” and I say well if it’s nice, stop being a Nancy, just buck up and sleep under the stars. But when the weather is less then perfect you’ll need a shelter, and even a simple shelter is better then sitting out and letting God bounce golf ball sized hail off of your melon.
1. Find wood- if you’re reading this blog you probably aren’t the most experienced woodsmen on the planet, so I’ll simplify the instructions. First off find wood, you can use wood for both kinds of trees (People really think there are only 2 kinds) Pine and Other.
haha I just showed you my wood
Now you have a pile of wood, I hope your not expecting to build a mansion fit for the worlds biggest baller. Because I have a reality check for you
Yah that pile of shrubs isn’t getting you on cribs.
2. Building the Frame- You will need one long stick and 2 medium sticks (that’s what she said). Form a triangle from the ground with the medium sticks and lash (tie) them together. Then in the cross point, set the long stick in the crotch of the intersecting sticks (That’s what she said … Again) and lash it once again.
Yes it’s supposed to look like that. No it’s not my lack of drawing skills. SHUT THE HELL UP. I’d Like to see you draw better
3. The Roof- Use other sticks and make it look like a rib cage. After successfully building something that looks like Calista Flockhart, scoop up some leaves and really fill in those cracks.
Yup, just like that. I hope that isn’t literally crap. Oh man would that be bad, that would worst them sharing a bed with me after an all you can eat Chili and Raisin Bran challenge.
4. Inspect Your Shelter- Take a Flash light and run it down your brand new leaf house. If you can see light coming through your makeshift walls you can bet your grandma’s ashes rain is coming through that puppy. If there are any holes slather in some branches and leaves.
MMM yah look it up and down, let the shelter know you want to be inside it latter.
5. Sleep- Toss down some nice thick pine bunches and moss to act like a mattress spark a fire and get some sleep. Why do I need a fire near my sweetass shelter I just built? I don’t know, to keep your self from crapping your pants while you sleep in a pile of lawn mulch. Every sound will be amplified but with a fire you’ll be able to rest easy, and will help keep away those creepy crawly things.
Sleep soundly because death is knocking at your door.
If you have something that you would like to know about the outdoors, or a story you would like to share, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org