Time To Change Up The Hot Dog Eating Contest- Bruce’s Thought Of The Day
Ok Joey Chestnut we know you can talk big game. We know you can slobber down almost 70 hot dogs. But how many pieces of pizza can you shove down your pie hole in let’s say 5 minutes? Or how many bacon cheeseburgers can you consume?
1 of America’s fun 4th of July traditions is about to get under way. The event has become part of Americana really. TV carries it live. Introductions the WWE would be proud of with nicknames, loud music, cheerleaders. All the pomp and pageantry of an event that has taken a life of it’s own. I say let’s see what the sultans of scarf can really do.
Let’s take pizza for example. Sure it is best in Italy. I have been to Italy and eaten their thin crust pizza. FABULOUS!!!!!!! But Pizza is considered an American favorite. I say in the background of the event at New York’s Coney Island we have lady liberty superimposed holding not a torch, but rather a pizza pie, just for effects mind you.
Ok Chestnut you can siphon down 68 dogs, but how many slices can you jam down? For better effect I say anchovies on that slice!!!!
Pizza not good enough for you? Ok how about another of our 4th of July BBQ specials like chicken. I don’t mean the legs either. Too moist. Too easy. I say go for the drier white meat, like the breast. Now what guy doesn’t like that idea Better yet let’s really challenge these human disposals. Hot Buffalo wings. I mean fire. I mean get the fire extinguisher wings. Now that would be great theater!!!!
Don’t get me wrong. I am amused by the hot dog eating contest but like many things it has grown a bit stale. Let’s add some juice to this circus.
So today, as Vegas sets the over/under at 65.5 dogs for the 6 time champ Chestnut, as he and former champ Kobayashi talk trash and ” turkey” I say we make it even more difficult to walk or eat your way to stardom.
As for the rest of us mere mortals let’s enjoy a day that many have fought and died for, Independence Day, and give thanks that because of the true hero’s, this nation can revel in the bloated, self indulgence yet childish fun that is pigging out and watching others like Chestnut pay for it!