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Charlie Sheen is to TV as T.O. is to Football

So I’m flipping through channels the other day and I come across Major League.  It made me think.  What in God’s name has happened to Charlie Sheen.  Dude’s such a good actor, just not great with other people, I guess.  Then it hits me.  Charlie Sheen = T.O.  It may seem like an apple to orange comparison, but I think it’s a valid one.  Both guys are complete dumpster fires off of the field (or stage), but when they step under the lights, they’re money.

Before we go too far, I know, I play fantasy football, too.  I know Terrell Owens didn’t have a great year last year, but look at the history over his entire career – dude can ball. Alright, moving on:

Much – well, too much – has been made recently of the personal life implosion of – and otherwise disaster that – is Charlie Sheen.  However, if you follow sports this type of debacle isn’t new. I offer you this comparison:

Without any doubt, Sheen and Owens are money in the bank in their respective fields (at least have been – Owens at age 37 isn’t exactly in his prime).  Just look at their histories:

Matthew Simmons, Getty Images

Sheen: Ferris Bueller, Platoon, Wall Street, Major League, Hot Shots!, Hot Shots! Part Deux, The Three Musketeers, The Chase, Major League 2, Money Talks, Two and a Half Men. *Credit imdb.com

You may not love everything on that list, but you can’t argue with their success – and if you argue with “Hot Shots!” or “Major League,” you’re just insane.  I know a lot of people aren’t thrilled with “Two and a Half Men,” but it’s (was) the most successful sitcom on TV.  Bottom line, dude’s bankable.

T.O.: 9 years over 1,000 yards receiving, 9 seasons of double digit touchdowns, 9 seasons averaging at least 15 yards per reception, 7 lost fumbles in his entire career – 7! EVER! In a 15-year career in which he’s touched the ball well over 1,000 times (Tiki Barber would kill for that kind of a stat). *Credit Espn.com

Look, whatever you think of Owens – and I’m not a T.O. Fan – when that dude steps between the white lines he’s a beast…was a beast.

Sheen and Owens are great at what they do.  They’re also messes elsewhere.  Quick caveat: it’s important to remember, I’m not comparing exactly what they’ve done off the field – just their overall disaster behavior:

Sheen: Once shot his fiancée in the arm (Did you know that?  I just found that out while researching – Yikes), has been accused of abuse and making verbal threats on several occasions, has – admittedly – battled addictions to drugs and alcohol, is a notoriously over-zealous partier, multiple trips in and out of rehab, and most recently caused the canceling of Two and a Half Men’s season after making anti-Semitic comments about the show’s producer Chuck Lorre. *Credits to bigraphy.com and Wikipedia.com

Well.  I think that speaks for itself.  Dude’s a mess.

Kevin C. Cox, Getty Images

Owens: Ran himself out of San Francisco after verbally bashing quarterback Jeff Garcia, got himself suspended for the rest of the year in 2005 as a member of the Philadelphia Eagles after ranting against both the quarterback and organization, ran himself out of Dallas following various squabbles with coach and quarterback, verbal spats in the media while a member of the Bills and Bengals, and a still shrouded in mystery incident with pills and an alleged suicide attempt which prompted his publicist to say that Owens had “25 million reasons to be alive.”

That also speaks for itself…Rough.

Surely they’re different, Sheen has battled drugs, alcohol ect, and Owens has battled his own ego and inability to deal with teammates.  Then again, TV and sports are different disciplines, so you wouldn’t expect huge similarities.  Clearly however, neither can play well with others.  Furthermore, both have gone into the media and offered laugh-worthy displays of…commitment, I guess?:

Sheen:  The posting of a picture of him and one of his “Goddesses” looking far too excited about some sort of fruit drink, meant as a mocking way to prove his new-found sobriety.

Goddesses?  Really?

Owens:  Who doesn’t remember Terrell Owens in his driveway doing sit-ups for television cameras, showing commitment to keeping himself in shape just after being sent home for the year by the Philadelphia Eagles.

A driveway is no place for calisthenics.

Both scenarios were over the top, unnecessary and kind of underscored concerns about their ridiculous behavior.  Next similarity, Catchphrases:

Sheen: “Winning.”

Winning at what? Were you and Tiger Woods in a ‘fall from grace’ competition?

Chris Graythen, Getty Images

Owens: “Get your popcorn ready.”

…I’ve got nothing for that.

My final similarity between the two is simply their ability to move the needle.  Both are dynamic personalities that draw tons of attention:

Sheen: Rightly or wrongly (let’s face it – wrongly), Sheen has, in the past few months, dominated news coverage and represented several networks’ lead story; edging out a civil war in the Middle East and ongoing political battles in Washington that will have large effect on the direction of our country.  I mean, I haven’t seen a, by all accounts, mediocre or bad stand up act get so much coverage since Carlos Mencia had a show (HEYOOOO!!!!! I kid, Carlos).

Come on! It’s a civil war, and we’re leading with Charlie Sheen’s twitter post?!…Seriously though, not a fan of ‘Mind of Mencia.’

Owens: How many 37-year-old wide receivers whom have played for at least five different teams in his NFL career – to say nothing of his horrific reality show – get the kind of coverage T.O. does?

None.  Heck, Andre Johnson doesn’t get that kind of coverage.

Sheen and Owens.  Actor and Wide Receiver.  Stud in his field (come on, you mean to tell me that you didn’t love Hot Shots!) and stud in his field (Man can catch the dang football). Complete disaster off camera and complete disaster off the field.  Your thoughts?

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