New York Jets Wear the Titan Jerseys: Whaaaaaaaaaaa?
The New York Jets need to be stopped. They’ve been committing atrocities for years now and I just can’t take it anymore. At first I thought that this was just a phase, that they’d grow out of it. But it’s become clear to me now that this is no mere phase, and I must be the one to stop them. New York Jets: STOP IT WITH THE TITAN JERSEYS, YOU’RE KILING US!
There has long been a war raging between my brain’s desire to consume football and my eyes’ desire to free themselves from the horrific pain caused by the Jets and their New York Titan jerseys. You’ve all seen it. They’re the God awful navy blue, gold(ish) and white monstrosities that are throwbacks to the days of the early 60′s.
I don’t get it. I just don’t get it! I understand rolling out these vision eviscerating junks once, but this has now happened in at least three seasons. Who in the Jets front office thinks that this is a good idea? Who is it that, every now and then, says “Hey! Let’s break out the ugliest things we can think of. It’ll be great TV!” I’m starting to wonder if occasionally the Jets’ laundry department is just running behind but they went into the back room and stumbled on a box of jerseys left over from when games weren’t in color, let alone HD. I mean look at that thing – well try to look at it. Can you actually call the number on Sanchez’s chest gold? What is that? Bile?
I guess they’re trying to give Jets fans hungry for merchandise more product to buy. But that makes me wonder, who in God’s name is buying these things? According to NFL.com, a standard Jets jersey sells for 85 dollars. 85 dollars? Excuse me? Does that come with shrimp? That’s an awful lot of money to pay for a jersey – let alone one that looks like someone vomited on a tablecloth and decided to make a shirt out of it.
I know I’m making a lot out of an incredibly trivial issue, but I just can’t understand why these disgusting uniforms keep popping up, forcing me to make the tough decision between watching football and choking back vomit for three hours. These things make the Maryland jerseys look like something out of a Polo catalog. So, New York Jets, for once again making nausea part of my Sunday football viewing, I say to you: