SkyMall Is Fun But Worthless

So I'm flying home from my vacation to Florida last weekend and I started reading the SkyMall Magazine.

You know - the magazine in the front of your seat that everyone reads but no one actually orders from?

Yes, that one.  The SkyMall catalog is seen by almost 90% of all airline passengers in the United States which means over 650 million people read this per year.

But again, who actually buys something from SkyMall?

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Honestly, have you ever been to someone's else and asked them, "Hey, where did you get that zombie garden statue from?"  Yes, they actually sell a Zombie Garden Statue.  It can be yours for $89.95.  I'm a huge Zombie fan but if I had a zombie statue in my front yard, I would probably be arrested for being really weird.

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Some other wacky and strange things in the SkyMall Magazine:

• Bionic Golf Glove: This is a glove you wear that will, according to SkyMall.com, "Give you an even hand surface, a better grip, all while eliminating natural interference."  What does that mean?  Isn't that what a regular golf glove provides?

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• Head & Eye Messager: SkyMall.com says this mask uses acupressure and heat compression and "delivers all the relaxing benefits of a professional head massage without the cost or the appointment".  Personally, if you ever wear this thing, I think you'd look like the dude from "Star Wars - the Next Generation."

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• Millennium Falcon Car Shade: I love the Star Wars movies but if you ever, ever get this for your car and then actually use it while you're shopping at the Mall, I will personally have your car towed based on the nerd principle.

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• Private iPhone Case: SkyMall actually made this device so you can discreetly watch a movie or read sensitive emails with others sitting nearby.  Oh yeah, because sitting there with this huge device covering your iPhone won't make your actions look suspicious, will it?

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As much as I love to read SkyMall while taking long plane trips, I can't ever see myself ordering a Canine Genealogy Kit or a Digital Video Spy Camera.  But it sure is fun to imagine what on earth you could use these contraptions for, isn't it?