What would you do for a gallon of Michael Jordan’s special sauce? Before you answer, allow me to clarify what I mean (you freaks).

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Apparently, in the experimental days of 1992, McDonald's released the McJordan for a limited time in select markets. The burger -- which you could get with the biggest, fattest bucket of fries you wanted -- was a quarter-pound of beef topped with cheese, bacon, pickles, onions and special recipe barbecue sauce. Scrumptious, I’m sure. Well now, 20 years and a few billion served later, some dude’s selling a gallon of McJordan sauce on eBay for the very reasonable price of $10,000.

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It's 20 years old. Who in the hell wants a gallon of 20-year-old Mickey D sauce? As a matter of fact, who in the hell stowed it away in the first place? And if someone were to, in fact, drop $10k on the jug, would they actually try it? Take it from a guy who bought a pack of 1990 Tops baseball cards in 2002 and tried to eat the gum: It’s not a good decision.

P.S. For anyone who wants to know how the gum tasted, it never congealed, it just crumbled into dust in my mouth.