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SkyMall Is Fun But Worthless

So I’m flying home from my vacation to Florida last weekend and I started reading the SkyMall Magazine.

You know – the magazine in the front of your seat that everyone reads but no one actually orders from?

Yes, that one.  The SkyMall catalog is seen by almost 90% of all airline passengers in the United States which means over 650 million people read this per year.

But again, who actually buys something from SkyMall?

Courtesy 104.5 "The Team"

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Honestly, have you ever been to someone’s else and asked them, “Hey, where did you get that zombie garden statue from?”  Yes, they actually sell a Zombie Garden Statue.  It can be yours for $89.95.  I’m a huge Zombie fan but if I had a zombie statue in my front yard, I would probably be arrested for being really weird.

Courtesy SkyMall.com

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Some other wacky and strange things in the SkyMall Magazine:

  • Bionic Golf Glove: This is a glove you wear that will, according to SkyMall.com, “Give you an even hand surface, a better grip, all while eliminating natural interference.”  What does that mean?  Isn’t that what a regular golf glove provides?
Courtesy SkyMall.com

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  • Head & Eye Messager: SkyMall.com says this mask uses acupressure and heat compression and “delivers all the relaxing benefits of a professional head massage without the cost or the appointment”.  Personally, if you ever wear this thing, I think you’d look like the dude from “Star Wars – the Next Generation.”
 
 
 

 

Courtesy SkyMall.com

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  • Millennium Falcon Car Shade: I love the Star Wars movies but if you ever, ever get this for your car and then actually use it while you’re shopping at the Mall, I will personally have your car towed based on the nerd principle.
Courtesy SkyMall.com

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  • Private iPhone Case: SkyMall actually made this device so you can discreetly watch a movie or read sensitive emails with others sitting nearby.  Oh yeah, because sitting there with this huge device covering your iPhone won’t make your actions look suspicious, will it?
Courtesy SkyMall.com

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As much as I love to read SkyMall while taking long plane trips, I can’t ever see myself ordering a Canine Genealogy Kit or a Digital Video Spy Camera.  But it sure is fun to imagine what on earth you could use these contraptions for, isn’t it?

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