I hate to spoil your week, but you may have a hidden infestation going on and not even know it.

CHECK. YOUR. CURTAINS.

If you live in Upstate New York, you're likely well-acquainted with our not-so-welcome friends, the stink bugs. And as the temperature begins to dip, you might find them paying more frequent visits than you'd prefer.

Stink bugs be like:

Oh hey bro, just wanted to stop by and see how you were doing, mind if I come inside and just sorta live out the remainder of my life without your consent?

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At this point I'm used to seeing a few... keyword being, a FEW. Not an entire god@#^! infestation. But that's what I discovered...

JUST.

THREE.

FEET.

FROM.

MY.

HEAD.

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So I still have an air conditioner in my bedroom window, right? I know it's October, but I like it really cold at night. And the seal around the unit isn't air-tight. Not quite big enough that a bat could fly into the room, but enough so that the occasional stink bug could move in.

What I failed to realize was, THEY WERE ALL MOVING IN. And I wasn't seeing this, because the curtains on that particular window were perpetually pulled to the sides... creating semi-permanent, warm, cozy creases that stink bugs could chill in.

So imagine my horror when I finally moved these curtains...

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DOZENS. DOZENS OF THEM.

I've gone on record by saying I didn't mind the occasional stink bug, and I've even released them back outside without killing them. MY ATTITUDE CHANGES IN LARGE QUANTITIES.

Stink bugs are harmless, but seeing a bunch of them together triggers a different part of your brain. Because they're not that dissimilar-looking from roaches, and if you were to see a bunch of roaches huddled together, you'd be COMPLETELY REPULSED.

So check your curtains, New Yorkers. And remove that air conditioner, whether you're ready to or not.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to empty my vacuum.

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