20 Unwritten Rules of Upstate NY

For the record, let it be known that these are not my rules, and to be honest, I'm not sure who created them. But a while back, I saw this list trending online and it piqued my interest.
I'm all about having pride in the area, and I love the Capital Region as much as anyone, but far be it from me to tell anyone how to live.  As long as you don't mess with me, I won't mess with you.

Upstate New Yorkers can be Territorial

But some folks from Upstate NY are territorial, with a voice that wants to be heard and values they want to be protected and while I don't agree with everything on the list, I enjoyed the passion and fervor with which it's delivered.

So, take it with a grain of salt.

I can't credit the author because I don't know who made this list, but I did find it here, where it's been shared 500-plus times.
Again, this is one person's take on life and living in Upstate New York and something that they believe to be quite accurate.

THE RULES ARE AS FOLLOWS: Listen up City Slickers!

1. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot.
2. Turn your cap around straight... your head isn't crooked.
3. Let's get this straight; it's called a 'dirt road' No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get dust on your $60,000 Lexus... Drive it or get out of the way. I drive a pickup truck because I want to.
4. They are called cows. They live outdoors. That's why they smell funny to you. But they smell like dairy products to us. Get over it. Don't like it? I-90 and I-87 go west and south... use 'em.
Cows graze on grass
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5. So every person in rural NY waves. It's called being friendly. Try to understand the concept.
6. If that cell phone rings while an 8-point buck and 3 does are coming in, we WILL shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time.
20 rules about life in Upstate New York, Upstate New York Rules, Upstate New York Humor, 518-news, 518news,
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7. Yeah, we eat meat, taters and gravy, beans and biscuits, and homemade pie. Do you want sushi and caviar? It's available down at Jim's bait shop.
8. The 'Opener' refers to the first day of deer season. It's like a religious holiday held the Saturday before Thanksgiving.
9. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of age.
10. No, there's no 'vegetarian special' on the menu. Order steak or chicken. Or, you can order Chef's salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham and turkey.
11. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats, vegetables, and bread. We use three spices...salt, pepper, and ketchup. Oh, yeah... We don't care what you folks in the Big Apple call that stuff you eat... IT AIN'T REAL CHILI !!
12. You bring 'coke' into my house... it better be brown, wet, and served over ice.
13. You bring 'Mary Jane' into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long blonde hair.
14. Our high school football is as important here as the Giants and the Jets and more fun to watch.
2020 High School Football Season Kicks Off in Indiana
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15. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don't hit the water hazards... it spooks the fish.
16. Colleges? We have them all over. Dozens of them above the PA and Conn. Borders as well as Community Colleges, and Voc-techs. They come outta there with an education plus a love for God and Country, and they still wave to everybody when they come home for the holidays.
17. Turn down that blasted car stereo! That thumpity-thump crap ain't music anyway. We don't want to hear it anymore than we want to see your boxers. (Refer back to #1.)
18. Four inches of snow isn't a blizzard... it's a flurry. Drive in it like you got some sense, and DON'T take all our bread, milk, and eggs off the grocery shelves. Worst case.. you may have to live a whole day without croissants. Anyway... the pickups with snowplows will have you out the next day. This ain't Alaska!
New York City Sees First Snow Accumulation In Over A Year
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19. If you've never been here, come visit our friendly folks and enjoy our spectacular scenery... lakes, mountains, farmland, great fishing and hunting, wineries, museums, and lots of history.
20. By the way, if you want to talk to God in the Adirondack Mountains ...it's a local call.

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